If you are grieving the death of a beloved pet, you are likely to be facing one or more of the following challenges:
- The people around you don’t understand or acknowledge your grief. You’re looking for compassion and answers, and all you get is something like: “It’s just a pet”, or “you can just get a new one”.
- Grieving is too painful, so you try to ignore it by keeping busy or numbing yourself in various ways, but it doesn’t really work, because you are cutting off your feelings and capability for living fully. Since grief comes in waves, grief will overwhelm you at times, anyway.
- Grief can be is so overwhelming that you feel you are drowning and your heart is shattered. You feel like part of you is gone – from a shamanic point of view, you may be right, and that is what is called soul loss.
So, allowing yourself to grieve without getting stuck in the grieving, is not so easy. In the following I’ll talk a little about soul loss caused by grief and how shamanic journeying can help you heal from pet loss.
Soul loss
Soul loss is when part of your soul or life essence leaves during a traumatic experience as a survival mechanism because staying in the body is simply too painful. Or, in the case of the death of a pet, especially if it was a sudden or violent death, the pet owner could suffer soul loss by unconsciously sending part of their soul out to be with the deceased pet. That will do neither the deceased pet in the afterlife nor the pet owner any good.
You need to acknowledge and be determined to work through your grief in order to to pave the way for the return of your lost soul part, so you can feel whole again. After all, if you make no changes, why would the soul part wish to return? A soul part that has left may come back on its own, but often the soul part that has left needs help to get back. And by the way – this applies to both humans and animals.
Retrieving lost parts and power
That is where shamanic journeying comes in. The shaman can, with the assistance of her/his spirit helpers, retrieve the lost soul part; and often a power animal or another guardian spirit will join you too.
A safe transition into the afterlife for the deceased pet
When your pet has died, a shamanic journey can give your deceased pet a good and safe transition into the afterlife. And that will help you too, because you will know that your deceased pet is okay. Getting healing help for yourself through a shamanic journey , will enable you to cope with the first initial shock and prevent you from suffering prolonged grief and pain.
After the journey
After the shamanic journey has been done for you and your deceased pet, you will be much better prepared to handle and continue the work on the daily emotions of grief.
You will learn to allow yourself to grieve, but you will also learn to see past the pain of the loss – you will see and remember the love you shared with your pet and be grateful for everything your pet has given you.
And you will learn to use that love and gratitude to not only improve your own life, but also to help others you meet on you path, whether it be humans or animals.
A brief summary for you
- It’s okay to grieve, but avoid feeding the grief with your mind thereby prolonging it
- Remember the love you shared with your pet
- Share that love in the world.
My name is Cindy and I too have just recently lost my cat which i also named Tigger. In 1999 I came very close to death due to a heart valve infection and was in hospital for a little over a month, My mother had me taken to live with her upon my release and i was pretty much all alone day in and day out and then one morning she came in my room and asked if I felt like getting out and she already knew what her intent was. we ended up at the Pet-smart weekend adoption rescue. I had Tigger since he was 8 weeks old. I have no children and so he has been my baby boy and would of turned 18 years old July 7th. I am so broken and just feel lost without my angel! He and I had such a special bond and he only wanted me almost like a certain breed of dog attaches themselves to one person. I have never been so broken and lost!
It has been nearly 3 weeks since my beloved cat Tigger had to be euthanised. He died on my birthday one week before Christmas. Tigger had been my pet companion for over 15 years. He was my comfort and friend when things were tough. He was with me 24/7 since a kitten. He gradually started going downhill for some weeks. I nursed him as he was in no pain and still eating a little and drinking and using his litter tray. He then became very weak and had difficulty breathing.
i had to make the awful and heartbreaking decision to have him put to rest. He died in my arms – the vet came to my home and was very gentle. Tigger was cremated and his ashes returned to me in a lovely sleeping cat urn.
I just cannot get over his death. I have never grieved like this before even when my parents died and any of my numerous loved pets. I just feel I cannot go on with this terrible pain that consumes me night and day.
I am very sorry for your loss and I understand your situation. I truly hope you can find some comfort through reading my blog and doing some of the techniques when you are ready. Peace and blessings, Marianne
I feel like you, like I don’t want to go on living and I can’t get past this pain. I miss my cat Max so much and can’t believe he is gone. 3 short days ago he was alive and full of fun, today he is dead and the house feels cold and empty
You have my deepest sympathy, Mandi, after the loss of your beloved cat Max. The loss of an animal companion can hit you much harder than you expect. I recognize the feeling of emptiness you mention; that’s also been a big one for me. It’s like a big hole they have left behind. I hope you may find comfort here, and that you by reading Kia’s messages will get an experience and inner knowing that while Max may not be with you in his physical body, the love you shared with him and all the fond memories you have will always remain with you. I love the Winnie The Pooh quote: “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” I feel that it brings a feeling of deep gratitude into the overwhelming grief and thereby eases the pain a bit.